The Caller: mosaic

That thing called life

Sun, 07 Dec 2008 23:18:00 GMT

Life…that scrap book where we collect pictures, meanings and experiences…where people leave their marks, prints and input…that giant Or tiny book that defines a period of time consumed on this land called earth.

Life…that takes your hand gently or pulls you…stop you or guide you to a path where you'd originally hand pick your roses, fruits and weeds to call it your own.

Life…that sometimes closes a door then opens a window and waits for you to jump.

Life…that mother that could keep you safe and warm in its womb…that monster that could steal your comfort away and frightens you out of breath.

Life…that intimating meaning… that vague taste… the blur ahead and the clear shiny sun.

Life…the treasure that is waiting for you to explore, the jewel that is hanging by a thread longing for you to grab.

Life…that field that you can't see its ending, fertile enough for your mind to grow…your imagination to emphasize…your will to endure its middle way rocky path that sometimes you might think that you've been pushed to take yet you've always had the chance to retreat from.

Life…that mystery that has been mistaken for so long for hand bag full of joys or a cartwheel full of power.

Life…that holds a meaning after years would throw its shadows and age those tiny mind cells then wrinkles that beautiful smile…

Stupid, who ever thinks understanding, is a head mechanism.

Stupid, who ever thinks he's got the answer and rests upon it.

It is the heart that realizes infinitely…while the mind tries to keep up with its limited abilities.

An open heart and a vivid spirit are the tools to enrich that scrap book.

To create a story from all these pits and pieces of mosaic emotions, thoughts and fine scratches…a picture would form to define a name that was once known along this thing called life.

collect your favorite colors and scents then hold hands with people…people those simplest form of life…the manifestation of an overwhelming existence that holds a logical meaning of…again, life.

Or that's how I feel right here…right now.

The warm up!

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 10:56:00 GMT

A very busy day

lots of work...love to meet a dead line.

missed a very important personal/ educative meeting

lots of work

Had a warm time with a sweet friend

I - surprisingly - asked the waiter to warm up the cold - supposed to be hot - drink!

some more warmth and understanding

"Declined" an offer to buy plastic bags from a very very polite sheikh in the street!!!

was embarrassed

Had a hug i really needed :)

Home...

Mom...nice!!!

weekend arrangements on the phone...couldn't talk much which is weired

unnecessarily justified myself

half stories...wanted to talk much...which is also weired

cold and cruel

Disappointed.

and about Obama, I keep asking myself why the heck should i care?!! fact is, wala balash!

No sleep...

what's new?!!!

Today...

They serve to please

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 09:28:00 GMT

She didn't skip one time...just ONE time without making a seen whenever we're in a restaurant!

Never had a GOOD meal...always complaining about this or that and calling the waiter for a session of tahzee2 as if he was the one cooking it!

The silly part is that most of the times there's nothing wrong in the food...it wasn't too rare...too cold...too salty...had a roach in it...NOTHING!

She'd call the waiter and say: This Caesar salad is not the Caesar salad I always order!

The poor guy would feel puzzled and would ask: Has it tasted any different than any of our other branches?!

She Would Say: Different than other restaurants!

The waiter would offer changing it with some other kind of salad of her choice - with no extra charge although she would've already taken some bites - and again, she would complain about...well, nothing specific!

I hate nagging the waiters about food, Prices and anything that would ruin the good time we'd supposed to be having in a night out.

Sometimes the food is bad, I know but that even isn't OK to talk in a mean way to the waiters.

Somehow she sees that my attitude is wrong and that going easy on my rights is what screwed up my life...little she knows!

I never give up my rights when I'm determined that i want them!

and I don't want to make the life of hard working category...harder!

Minding My Own Business

Sat, 19 Apr 2008 10:50:00 GMT

Good morning,

As many of my friends know, I've been having troubles for a long time. Professional and personal struggles paved my way. I've been also talking about a NEW PHASE that i should attain which would - hopefully - heal wounds and rests my spirit.

Well, a couple of weeks ago i decided to turn the last page, close the book and wave goodbye the old phase...it was soaking in pain that it almost changed my cheering nature into a gloomy one.

I have made a great risk...I'm starting my own business now, a little company of my own.

I let go of the settled well paid prestigious job to follow my passion and fulfill a dream...yesterday i was visiting Mais* blog and i read a very encouraging quote: ships may be safe at shore but that's not why ships were built.

Big step for the single mom everyone expected to crack two years ago.

Allah yustor!

I can't say i'm not scared...i am very much so but i'm also driven with my passion to go for it and take the leap while managing my time to fulfill other passions for art and community giving and most of all dedicating proper quality time for my kids.

I know it's hard but i'm willing to give it a wholeheartedly try.

As I write this the curtain guy is probably half way there to deliver the office curtains.

With everything else delivered, i'm waiting for the designer also to finish the Logo.

I gotta start looking for someone to take care of the site and domain.

Official work around the office - views the Nile by the way :) - will start tomorrow Inshallah...Interviews day.

Last Thursday was the memory of one year since my father died...my beloved dad who fills my life with his kind heart and great passion...Allah yer7amoh...I feel so fortunate that I have a legacy to follow...the way people loved his kindness and how he expressed his soul through his art just inspires me to follow that.

I chose not to make his memory a day of sadness as it rests in my heart anyway only because i miss him so much...Instead, I just went through his life and made as much do3aa as i could.

As for the personal aspect...it's really strange that somehow i've been stopping the wallowing on memories and heartaches.

Emotions carve my name but i won't let them break me...i don't need any dwelling now...i will intentionally disregard it.

Please wish me luck and remember me in your prayers.

Tags...the skeleton in my closet!

Mon, 31 Mar 2008 18:40:00 GMT

I'm letting go of all worries and I'm slamming the bloggospheric wall ( if such name exists ) with the hidden truths about me along with the purpose I blog...hope no one freaks out on me...

First I was tagged by Jerusalem my dear dear palestinian super passionate friend who lives in Jordan yet always dream of Jerusalem the holly city....she asked why have i been blogging and the answer is simple: I started with an invitation for others to find happiness through faith and reached - for now - the point where i try to talk my self into what i once invited others to through documenting the change in me and analysing the thoughts....not that simple ha?!!

all and all, to the majority I'm just ranting.

Then Miss Promise as i would like to call her - with her permission of course - aka Lost within wanted to know ten things about me....here you go dear:

I feel very very against men buying me things even a cup of coffee regardless how close or related they are...i feel irritated and won't rest till i return the favour + +
I have very sensitive skin...a scratch could scar me forever ( some thing goes for my soul )
I hate blond men...can't stand their sight!
I feel sorry for all creatures even ants, roaches and snakes.
I don't like Om Kolthoum at all...as a character and as a type of singing regardless that she has great voice capabilities.
Can't hold a laugh no matter the situation, whom I'm with and how important it's for me to be silent.
I have a weired attraction towards men who turn to be andal rasmi, cruel and self centered and I do get so weak and blind to be dragged to their filth - I guess i'm not so good myself - with only one exception in my whole life.
I sing....just love it and inherited musical taste and ears from my dad Allah yer7amo.
I dream of inventing something that would make the police know what happened as any victim went through before they die.
My teen interests were: Fighter Jets, Music and wearing as much moose, Jell and - please don't laugh - 7 Up on my hair as possible to make it frizzy!

** Now I tag Jerusalem, Mais*, Sharifo, Hamede and Summer only if u'd like to.

Guys, I'm so pissed off today.

Have a good night.